Dear Lulu Jeh: A few weeks ago, I hooked up with a guy, who was a visitor. We ended up spending a long weekend together while he was in town, and have kept in touch ever since. I don’t see a long-term future with him — he lives abroad after all — but he seems keen for something to develop. Do you think it’s worth pursuing? — Plotting My Next Move
Dear PMNM, you’re in that typical Hong Kong conundrum of connecting with someone special — who’s not based here.
There are a couple of things to consider here. Is he indeed someone special? Are either of you open to the idea of moving abroad? Is he willing to make this work with you? Are you both willing to do long-distance?
You have to understand that a night of passion and a few days together means that you really only know each other on a very superficial level.
Because of the limited time you’ve spent together, you need to figure out whether he’s actually the right person for you instead of letting infatuation and happy memories affect your judgment.
Remember that a relationship is about giving and taking. You need to be on the same page before either of you makes the all-important decision to enter a relationship, or even think about moving abroad.
Why don’t you find a way of spending some more time with him, face to face, in order to think about what to do next?
If it doesn’t go the way you want, then you need to move on. — Lulu
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