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By Lulu Jeh | July 6th, 2023

Hey Lulu,

Lately, I’ve noticed that the dating scene in Hong Kong has become more and more competitive, and it’s taking a toll on my mental health. I’m constantly bombarded with social media updates from friends getting engaged or having babies, and I can’t help but feel like I’m falling behind. Every date feels like an interview, and I’m exhausted from trying to present the best version of myself all the time. I’m starting to wonder if finding love in this city is even worth it. How do I navigate this cutthroat dating scene without losing myself in the process? And is it possible to find a genuine connection in a city where everyone seems to be out for themselves?

— 30-year-old struggling to find love

Dear 30-year-old struggling to find love,

I can understand how overwhelming and discouraging the dating scene in Hong Kong can be. It’s easy to get caught up in the social media updates of friends and acquaintances and feel like we’re not measuring up. But I want you to know that you are not alone in feeling this way. Many people in the city struggle with the same issues.

First of all, it’s important to remember that finding love is not a competition. There’s no set timeline or age when you’re supposed to meet “the one.” Everyone’s journey is different, and it’s important to focus on your own path rather than comparing yourself to others.

Secondly, dating should be enjoyable and fulfilling, not a chore or a job interview. Take some time to reflect on what you’re looking for in a partner and what makes you happy. When you’re on a date, try to be present in the moment and enjoy the experience, rather than worrying about impressing the other person.

Finally, don’t give up hope. While it can be challenging to find genuine connections in a city as fast-paced as Hong Kong, it’s not impossible. Consider joining social groups or clubs that align with your interests, or trying out online dating apps that allow you to connect with people who share your values and goals.

Remember, finding love takes time and patience. Focus on taking care of yourself and pursuing your own passions, and the right person will come along when you least expect it.

Wishing you all the best,

Lulu Jeh

Dating Scene in Hong Kong

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Read more of Lulu Jeh’s sage advice here.